I found this on my computer today as I was cleaning up files and such. I wrote it about two years ago, and I'm happy to report that some of this has changed. But still, isn't it interesting how one can profess belief, but often operate in opposition to that claim? I know who Jesus is and what He's about, but I don't always live like it.
This is a description of the Jesus my insecurities, fears and lack of faith often reflect. I want that to change.
I do not know Jesus as I claim.
I know a version of Him.
I’m acquainted with a Lord who fits rather well into my mindsets and traditions.
I know a Savior who has answers and offers them to me in familiar and encompassing promises.
He’s somewhat trustworthy but not always capable of addressing my concerns and meeting my needs.
He hears my prayers but requires my assistance in coming up with suitable solutions.
He doesn’t mind so much if I put off spending time with Him. He understands my busy schedule and is gracious to share me with all of my important and pressing commitments.
This Jesus is passive concerning the eternal affairs of man. He’s glad when someone is saved, but is sympathetic toward my fear of man and lack of urgency in reaching the lost.
He conforms to my emotional state. His nearness or lack thereof depends on how I’m feeling at any given moment. His plan wanes when I am frustrated or desperate, and is absolute when I’m on board.
He loves me, but doesn’t require much of me, except when I fail. Then he’s terribly disappointed.
He’s susceptible to my whims.
He’s flippant with the aching desires of my heart, and seems to withhold for no good reason.
How fickle this Jesus is.
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